Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari woke up at 10:23 and grabs his 256GB smartphone to check the notifications for what’s changed during a night, people who missed him, forwarded him some random messages, some girls interested in him, some trending news about his favourite actor, birthdays, events, feeds of people, interesting things happening in lives of his connections, some controversial news, some interesting video, some hot pictures of some page 3 model, some scandal, some opportunity for him, some magic overnight and a lot many expectations before the data turned on!
He is super excited, aren’t you?
Data is turned on and the level of expectations are at peak!
Notification 1: Secure your life with X1Y2Z3 Bank by investing in SIP!
Notification 2: Recommended Yourfilm added a new video!
Notification 3: Family Group Chat:
Chikki: Good Night Mosi!
Notification 4: Upgrade RANDOM.PORN.APP to Premium and get access to live Video Room!
Notification 5: Backup your data! Last Backup “never happened!”
Notification 6: “The.friend.you.dont.like” is nearby! Meet him before he leaves!
Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari slams all notifications by clicking on CLEAR ALL button to get rid of the only unwanted things in life, directly killing his expectations!
He is still in bed, scrolls over various apps, checks feeds and is flooded by Sponsored ads to kill his excitement.
Switches over another app for some video and is stabbed again by a video ad! Video plays and the content is shit! Sheer waste of time!
Checks Photo app and finds some Memes to the rescue! Here he finds something of interest and checks out all the memes.
“It’s not मीमी, but मीम!”
It’s 11:32 and he is still on the bed, waiting for some Magic Boom Call (not Nature Call)!
::: Magic Boom Call is nothing but a self-creation. It is like an expectation for something to happen from inside that smartphone:::
“Ok, let me watch the favourite scene from my favourite movie which I watched almost 342 times”, speaks to himself!
Quickly opens Movie App, scrolls did not find, clicks on the search icon, types in hurry, make a typo, get suggestions from the dropdown, clicks on the first link,
Ad pops up!
F*** M***** F*****! Skips the ad and BOOM!
With Respect, The Central Board Certificate!
The sponsors! The Financers!
Ok, scroll to 01:23:44 and here is the perfect scene happening!
This can make my day!
He forgets that he is a human and he can have some responsibilities, daily routine tasks and gets too much involved in the movie and finishes the entire 2 Hr 44 M movie.
Our Reporter from Mars interviews him after he is done:
Our Reporter from Mars: So sir, how was the Movie?
Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari: It was great! I feel like watching it every day!
Our Reporter from Mars: What is the best part of the Movie?
Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari: When the Squirrel runs after a Dog to bite him!
Our Reporter from Mars: So sir, did anything annoy you?
Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari: Yeah! When I was waiting for messages, I got nothing! But while I was watching the movie, I got almost 20 messages and 3 Phone Calls! And every time there was a message, I had to get back to the message, drop a reply and then return back to the app, resume from where I left and screen rotation to Video mode!
Our Reporter from Mars: Do you have something not to get distracted? Like Mobile Data Off?
Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari: C**t**e, MOVIE KAISE CHALTI FIR!
Our Reporter from Mars thanked Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari and shared the reports with us! Our Data Science team based in Mercury is working on it.
Anyway, back to reality!
Now, with a “HEAD FULL OF GUILT”, Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari leaves for a daily routine which includes:
- Brushing teeth by herbal toothpaste bought by his Grandfather for Strong teeth
- Having Tea, the only motivation for survival
- Checking out the Bollywood Page of the Hindi Newspaper! Ok, Kapoor had a new affair, BORING! Kumar gets a new movie, BORING! Khan’s movies clashing, BORING! Casting Couch scandal by a Hot Actress, INTERESTING!
- Washroom time
- No routine ahead! Just some Daydreaming, Frustrations, Overthinking, Gossips, Half Hearted Job Applications and Eating!
Looking at his hopeless face in the mirror and questioning about his existence, he pulls up his brush, Herbal Paste and starts brushing.
Dad: So finally the President has got time for own! Disgusting! It’s 1:30 and you are up for brushing! How careless you can be! When we were of your age, we used to leave the bed at 4:30!
No reply from Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari! He is already hopeless and has no clue what’s happening around, instead, he is imagining what all must have happened at the couch, with the hot actress, news published yesterday!
He does the tea and Daily News quickly! Finds another interesting article on “INDUSTRY IS NOT SAFE FOR NEWCOMERS” and starts imagination!.
He grabs his 256GB smartphone and moves to the washroom!
We did not extend further because Imagination, Creativity, Expectations and Positivity are at peak in the Washroom and Rajat Vinashak Singh Pujaari tends to spend half of the time there. Covering that would have a load on our servers resulting in a crash!
P.S. The story was covered before Porn Ban!
P.S.2: We are not promoting 256GB smartphone. This is not a paid post!